A couple of months ago, I was walking in Bangsar to get lunch when someone approached me on the street to ask me about the jeans I was wearing that day! Although I was in kind of a hurry, I was happy to stop to speak to her as she sounded so genuinely curious. She exclaimed that she couldn’t find the right pair of jeans because, in her exact words: “I have a big butt like yours!”
Mind you, I did not take any offense at all! Any other person who did not think like I do would’ve set this woman in her 20s on fire. I didn’t think that this woman was criticizing my body shape and my outlook, instead, she thought she probably could relate to me. And so I briefed her on some tips and tricks to dress a pear-shaped body, shook hands and I went on to get my lunch.
While I ate my lunch, I pondered that woman’s statement to me. I thought to myself, if that exact statement was said to me about 3-5 years ago, I would’ve driven myself crazy! I would’ve been so embarrassed and would probably starve myself that night hoping to lose the butt in the morning. I would’ve dressed in unshapely pants for months expecting to hide the voluminous part of my hips. Heck, I would not have made it to lunch without shedding some salty tears!
All the bad memories of how I was body shamed in my younger days came flooding in. I remember how it bothered me so much. My friends would poke and make fun by calling me names that characterized the shape and so-called-enormity of my butt. Some of my family members who were “kind” enough to have my best interest in mind were intentionally and unintentionally body shaming me, for instance, by making me sit in the front passenger “so 4 can sit comfortably behind.” Oh, how could I forget this one time before a relative’s wedding when one
lovely family member had told instructed me to slather on more makeup to take the attention away from my big butt and wide hips! *Roll eyes*
Coming back to the now, I am so glad to have really grown to learn and love my body. I have grown to accept that I have a larger butt. I even find it humorous that the word backside is synonymous with gluteus maximus because errr… I have a Maximus butt! I no longer attempt to manipulate my natural body shape, instead, I work out to sweat and feel healthier and light. I’m no Kardashian and will probably never live that lavish lifestyle, but I am blessed with countless opportunities to enjoy living in the body I love, to do the things I want to do and to tick off my bucket list one-by-one! I even take compliments and criticisms graciously because one way or another, people are curious to know how it feels like to have a boom-boom-pow bum. Truth be told, when I see another equally endowed woman, I tend to feel a certain connection like we are an extended family, pun intended.
If someone tells you that you’re not beautiful, turn around and walk away so they can have a great view of your fabulous ass!
~ Miley Cyrus ~
To all my followers and readers out there, please bear in mind that there are millions of different body types in this world and despite what our chauvinistic mainstream culture would have us think, no two persons are meant to look identical. I certainly am not meant to have a petite bum and perhaps someone out there may attempt 100 squats a day and still not achieve a Kylie Jenner butt! It saddens me to hear so many beautiful women say “I am so fat and I need to lose the tummy.” and all I see is a normal petite girl with no fat roll whatsoever to lose. I used to say those same things to myself all the time but it did nothing to me except bring me down even lower with my self-esteem. To all the girls, ladies, gorgeous women out there, please don’t do that to yourselves because when you hold your bodies to absurd societal standards and try to look like stereotypical magazine models or celebrities, you make it crazy difficult to really love yourselves!
Remember, everybody’s body moves differently. Work out, exercise those muscles and bones to stay healthy, eat nutritious foods and drink lots of water. Keep those positive vibes up and negativity low and you will soon notice the difference – the difference in the level of self-confidence and happiness. Because until and unless you learn to treat your body with love and respect, no one will.
Question of the day
Which part(s) of your body do you love?